You Take the Good You Take the Bad...

The good news first, I have a job with heaps of work. The bad news is my laptop crapped out. The good news is my son is so awesome, he secretly gave his dad money to buy me a new one. The bad news is I have to pay him back eventually. The good news is, he doesn’t know what “interest” means.

I’ve been collaborating with a children’s production company while all hell has been breaking loose. You guys, this blog like our summer has sucked so bad! There’s a ton of news and information I want to share with you but I really don’t know where to begin. And unfortunately, I’ve got more bad news than good news.

My father-in-law remains in critical condition, but since has been flown out of Osage Beach to Columbia, Missouri. He was beating the odds by recovering from multiple system failures and kicking that septic pneumonia’s ass.

Because he was in such a critical state, he was rarely moved or adjusted which led to a bedsore. A plastic surgeon on staff was supposed to be tending to the small wound above his tailbone, and for reasons unknown and/or those we can’t understand, he didn’t do anything for Pops.

One morning I walked into his room and smelled a hint of decomposition. This was two days after our family requested a second opinion on his bedsore. Besides not having any communication with the doctor, we were worried about the amount of pain Dad was having. Physical therapists tried working with him but he was in too much pain to perform all of the tasks they asked of him. So it was really hampering his recovery.

No other doctor (second opinion) ever showed up. My mother-in-law and I met with the ICU manager and other hospital personnel to demand answers and action. One of us may have used the F word, but I ain’t sayin’ who!

A doctor, surgeon, wound care specialist, angel who is not affiliated with the hospital, who was on vacation when we called asking for his help, saved Pops. He came in while he was supposed to be on vacation to work on a patient who wasn’t even his. Within an hour of meeting this man, he completed a surgery on him and was making a recommendation, “To save this man’s life, I would have him airlifted to Columbia.” Within 20 minutes the flight crew was loading him up.

His bedsore grew large enough to cover his entire rear end. It went clear down to his bone. He had to have a colostomy because it was so bad. He’s had so many surgeries, I’ve lost count. The day before yesterday, his surgeon finally reached healthy tissue and bone. So that is good news. But the poor guy has been through so much pain and recovery will take months.

To top it off, my mother-in-law found out their insurance doesn’t cover the cost of blood he receives since the hospital doesn’t use a blood bank. So instead of worrying about those costs, I had a blood drive for him to replenish the supply. Thankfully, a lot of people came out. Again, good news!

Are you still with me? I know it is like the blog that never ends. But wait there's more. I’m working on five manuscripts simultaneously, with two parents in the ICU in different states.

Calgon…you know the rest.

Yes, I said two parents. If you aren’t following me on Twitter, this is news to you, but not the good kind.

My mom is even a broke ass bitch…wait, that doesn’t sound very nice. Lucky for me her sense of humor remains intact while the rest of her is running like a broken-down jalopy. After showing “stoke-like” symptoms, my nephew Yoda dragged her ass to the ER. Her sodium level was really low. She was dehydrated, and when they dug a little deeper, that’s when all hell broke loose.

Her echocardiogram looked like crap. Then they did a angiogram. And for their next trick, they gave her a quadruple bypass. Apparently her heart was a hot mess, with two arteries clogged 100%, one 90% and the other 80%.

Her blood levels were wonky yesterday and she may require a transfusion, but otherwise, she’s on the road to recovery.

I would have shared a picture of my mom, however she said with the gown being open in the back, she is afraid “My whole butt hole will show.” I promise she will NEVER live that one down! She told my sister Anita to close the back of her gown tightly because she didn’t want any of her butt hole showing. Gotta love what hospital drugs will make a person say!

Meanwhile, back at La Love Shack de Lane… Oh did you think it was over? Hahahaha! You silly silly reader, you! …we are some broke ass bitches! Not just our wallets, everything around us is breaking. I’ll list some of the things rather than bitch about them individually. The lawn mower, Mr. Lane’s truck, my car, Lane 1’s car, my laptop, the friggin’ coffeepot wouldn’t even show mercy as it also bit the dust. This is after Lane 1’s car was hit and fixed.

Why would three check engine lights come on within days of each other? Because that is just how our summer has been going. ANT said it is the universe trying to force us to slow down. He might be right, but I’m still gonna bitch about it because bitching is one of the things I do best.

There are many more things going on. Some bad, some good, but I think this is all my attention span can take at this point.

Thanks for all of the emails, calls, messages, prayers, vibes etc. You guys really keep me going and I really appreciate you all looking out for me and my family.

Love you like I birthed ya! Lo