Accidental Abuse

It happens to the best of us. No matter how hard we parents try to keep our children out of harms way, we sometimes slip up. A friend of mine told me about her husband and son playing football in the house, which resulted in nine stitches in the forehead of her son.

I tried telling her that kind of thing happens and told her not to be so hard on her husband. At least he plays with his kids. Right? It wasn't like he bashed the boy in the head with a brick.

While none of my accidentally inflicted abuse stories resulted in stitches, I could feel this guy's pain. I shared a couple of stories with her in hopes of her not killing her husband. Because having a friend in jail for murder would really suck.

A couple of years ago we found a stray kitten. She was tiny and starving so we decided to bring her home and take care of her. I expected we would find her a home once she was strong and well, but Lane 2 fell in love. We were renting a small house and were not supposed to have pets.

By spring, the kitten had grown a lot and was looking for love, making it harder to keep her hidden. She began to howl at any open window to let the boys know there was some fresh pussy in town.

One night, while experiencing warmer than normal spring temperatures, I slept with the window partially open. The cat kept trying to get into the window.

While I was in a deep sleep, she snuck up to the windowsill. I woke up to the call of the wild. I closed the window but soon became overheated and reopened it. I could feel the cat trying to make a break for the window again, and while half asleep, I shoved her down with my foot.

Don't call PETA just yet. I didn't kick her. I gave her a slow soft shove with the top of my foot.

As the night went on, she grew more persistent, as did I. After at least 20 shoves off of the end of my bed, one might think she learned not to try again. Well she didn't.

My daughter did, however. Lane 2 was trying to sneak into bed with me and in the midst of my twilight sleep, I assumed my daughter was the cat again. And I kicked, I mean, gently shoved her with my foot... in the face. Her front tooth came out. Her mouth and nose were bleeding. I was mortified! Talk about a rude awakening!

My twisted little girl was laughing. I guess I have some more explaining to do. Her tooth was loose before she went to bed, hanging by a thread loose. She was just too afraid to pull it out earlier that night, which is why she was laughing. She was thrilled that the tooth fairy was coming after all. Plus she is one of those people who gets nose bleeds if the wind blows in the wrong direction.

At the time it was as funny as nine stitches to the forehead. Seeing blood on one of your own children and knowing you were the cause of it is one of the most horrifying feelings.

Now we can all laugh at what happened. Especially since she accidentally got me back. But that's a blog post for another day.