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Monday, April 17, 2006

Is It Over Yet

St. Peter, Paul and Mary School played a dirty little trick on me. They gave the kids a week off for "Spring Break," earlier this month. Then they gave them an extended weekend called "Easter Break," which ends tomorrow morning. When we were kids we simply had Spring Break over the Easter holiday. This is so not fair.

Yesterday, Easter at Mom's was great. Great people, great food, oh yeah, there was also great embarrassment for me. Anyone have any idea why my mother would think dinnertime was the right time to hold up a bottle of stool softeners and say, "Lois, make sure you take these."? Anyone know what might have been going through her crazy little head? Anyone?

Ignoring Mom really isn't an option because she is persistent as all hell. She shook the bottle until I took it out of her hands.

My sister Angie's boyfriend Papa Roach thought he would chime in on the fun by making subtle hints about a certain someone who gets stage fright. Oh yeah, he's funny.

He is nearly as funny as Mr. Lane who, in a very Jim Carrey way, turned his back to me, grabbed his butt cheeks and said while squeezing them, "May I ass you a question, Lo? Could it be that your anal tube caused your killer rhoid from hell?"

And like father like son. Lane 1 said, "Mom? I think the Easter Bunny hid an egg in your drawers."

I have officially become the butt of every joke. I hope you all had a much better keaster, I mean, Easter than I did.