Life's Little Lessons

I've Fallen And I Can't Get Up!

You've seen the Medic Alert commercial with the old lady, right? The one where she falls in her house but doesn't land by the telephone. All she has to do is push a button that hangs from her neck, shout what is wrong and help is immediately on the way.

There I was, outside playing in the snow with the kids, not killing them for accidentally hitting me in the back of the head with a snowball. I turned and ran, to escape what was becoming an all-out war of blizzard proportions, when my foot slid out from under me (reason 4,621 why people over 30 should not run on ice) and whammo! Down I went, hard.

I think I even obtained a new crack for my ass. I'm scared to look. Hitting your tailbone on concrete covered with ice sending jolts of pain through your back, probably isn't a good thing. But shit that was fun! I only wish I could walk well enough to fetch a nice hot cup of coffee.

Kids 1, Mom 0 = I'll get you my pretties!
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Ding Dong The Kids Are Gone

Real school is back in session for the little Lanes. They weren't too happy about getting up, or eating breakfast, or showering, or brushing their teeth, or anything.

I gave them a gentle reminder that I could have made them go to school yesterday. I was also quick to let them know the staying home shit would never happen again if they continued to give me trouble about getting their asses ready for school.

The sound of silence here is downright deafening but man I love it!

Mom 1, Kids 1 = Haha!

Edited to say thanks whitey! I forgot to include their point from earlier.