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Wednesday, September 07, 2005

Everybody's Workin' For The Weekend

Everybody but me. After a craptastic week, I was pleasantly surprised at how well my weekend turned out. Saturday I spent the night at my mom's place. Since my car troubles started, I haven't been able to go see her once a week like we are used to. She worried because I wasn't confident that my car troubles were really over. I told her not to panic unless I was still not there by 5:15. She wanted to know what route I was taking just incase. It wasn't much different than our conversations when I was a teen going to hangout with my friends. So many questions. Gotta love Mom in all of her worry-wartedness.

The whole weekend brought me back to my youth. Playing beauty shop like in the good old days with my sisters was by far the best time we've had together in a long time. Thanks for all of the nice comments on that post, by the way. (58 comments may be a record at Home Fires.) It was so cute how Angie and Anita made makeup faces at me, as if them showing me their puckery lips would help me pucker mine better. They also made wide-eyed looks when it came time for the mascara. They are adorable!

My mom waited on me hand and foot. And said "Don't forget to put that in your blog." I know I tease her unmercifully but she just sort of deserves it plus I think she kind of likes it too. Every single cup of coffee I drank, she poured. For the first time ever, I got to coffee clutch with Anita. She recently discovered she likes the taste as much as she likes the smell of coffee, and is now a member of the cool coffee clutcher club.

My mom tried to insist that I was sleeping in her bed and she was sleeping on the couch. I finally told her the bed still smells like Dad and it makes me sad being in her room. She said I could take the couch. I got comfy and planned to watch the news. Even though we'd already said goodnight, she came back into the living room to make sure I knew how to use the remote controls.

"Honey if the fan is too much on you, use this." She handed me a remote control.

"You have a remote for your fan?"

"Sure. And, if the air is too cold on you, use this one."

"You have one for your air conditioner too?"

"Of course. All of the new air conditioners have them."

"I did not know that. Thanks. Goodnight."

"Oh, one more thing. Incase you get tired of the TV, here is the stereo remote. But some of the TV stations have good music on them. You do have the TV remote right?"

"Well, yeah. Now I have four remotes. Hopefully I won't try to change the channel and blow myself off of the couch with the fan by accident."

"No. You'll be fine. This remote is for the TV, this one is for the DVD player and here is the VCR one. But none of them work the volume for some reason."

"You mean, I might have to actually get up?"

"Funny. All I am missing is a remote control for you."

"Thanks Mom. I love you too. Goodnight."

I looked at the six remote controls laying beside me, shook my head and fell asleep.

Sunday my nephew drove over to my sister Mary's to bring his little sister over to hang out with my kids. Another weekend bonus was teaching my nephew Yoda (22-years-old) and my niece Elmira (7-years-old) a nasty little trick. It's been at least a decade since I've been able to show my oldest nephew something gross. Thankfully, I was able to send Elmira home with something to drive Mary crazy with. My daughter Lane 2 and I showed them how to properly tuck a drinking straw into their armpit, while blowing into the other end. It creates the sound of the perfect armpit fart.

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Here's Yoda trying out his straw armpits farts. He said, "I think I need to shave to get just the right sound." I thought he would blow a gasket because he turned all shades of red. I kindly let him know he was blowing too hard and had his arm tucked too tightly. He finally got it. Looking at that picture, I'm sure you are all equally shocked that the boy is still single.

Elmira picked up on it right away. I wonder why my sister Mary hasn't called to thank me.