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Thursday, December 14, 2006

You’ll Rot Your Brain Out

I probably don’t have to tell you guys how stupid I am. I have no idea how or why I forgot to tell you this. When my in-laws gave us all of that wonderful furniture and stuff listed a few posts ago, they also gave us a 42 inch TV. We have this loft in the new house and decided it would one day be our TV room. It’s upstairs and out of the way. It is a perfect lounging area.

Before they gave us that monstrosity of a television, we had four plastic lawn chairs, an armoire, with a 13 inch TV in there. Talk about a fucking upgrade!

Now it looks like a real live TV room. We have the couch and loveseat, coffee table and two end tables, all of which they gave us, in there too. Minus, of course, the plastic chairs that I finally took back outside.

By the way, all of that snow finally melted. But not before we had to move in the new fridge. We actually had to shovel snow that drifted four to five feet along the entire deck, plus a pathway through our lawn, leading all the way to the kitchen door, because it wouldn’t fit through the other door. That day Mr. Lane and I said lots of bad words in each other’s general direction.

Off of the deck, we had to go down a few steps before getting to the lawn. That was where my mouth took over and bad words fell out. I was on the bottom of the steps. He tried to gently push it down one step at a time. Instead, it came flying down all of the steps. Lucky for the fridge, my shoulders and collar bone were there to brace its fall. Seriously, I think I fractured something because it still hurts. But purple is totally my color so it’s all good.

Mr. Lane is funny. When he realized why I was dropping F bombs and such, he started to swear right along side of me.

It was sorta like this (me) “Fuck! Ouch! Get it off of me!”

(Him) “Shit, fuck! Hang on! Sonofabitch!”

Good times!

Back to the whole TV thing. Sorry, I get easily distracted. Our family hasn’t been really big on TV. Well, Mr. Lane has, but was out voted. It’s been over ten years since we’ve had a TV in our living room, or in this case, TV room. And the largest TV we ever had was a 32 incher, we bought way back when we were shacked up without kids. I eventually gave that TV to a family friend, since it wasn’t used very much.

(Lois stands and faces the group) You guys, I am a TV addict. Now I remember why I got rid of that 32 incher in the first place. I wasn’t just being nice to a friend. I wasn’t sparing brains from rotting out of the kids’ little heads. I have no self control! None. Whatsoever. Last night, prime example, I watched TV until my eyeballs grew grainy and could no longer stay open. I think I went to bed after 3 a.m. And there just isn’t any good reason for that.

So while I love and appreciate my in-laws and all of their fabulous gifts, my tired ol’ bones and eyeballs are cussing them out big time today. If you can, take a nap for me today. I’ll be working (Insert tears here.), which technically is good news to share another day.

P.S. Thanks for all of the well-wishes for my sister Anita. It means a lot to us.