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Thursday, February 17, 2005

How Was Your Day?

Meanest Mom In The Whole Wide World Strikes Again And Again
Just ask my kids how mean I am and they will fight to share their stories. This morning, I did it again. Same fight, both kids. It seems that once a child reaches a certain age, they no longer want to wear coats outside. I guess warmth equals uncool. They both protested by telling me they were wearing sweatshirts over their t-shirts, which I could clearly see. It was 14 degrees (Fahrenheit) this morning when we left the house. What is wrong with these children? Maybe tomorrow rather than driving them to school, I'll just have the short bus pick them up. Yes, I won another fight.

Lane 1 also fought with me about eating breakfast today. He is so skinny and is growing tall so fast, he needs to eat. (Maybe a full belly equals uncool too.) So Meanest Mom strikes a second time in one morning by forcing the child to eat a piece of toast, a cup of yogurt and a handful of grapes. Score two for Mom! And just think, the day is young!

Grace Of A Newborn Giraffe
Lane 1 is going on a fieldtrip today to the ice rink. He asked me if I could chaperone the trip but I had to tell him no. Most of the time I comply. I actually like fieldtrips. Today I am at my parent's house and won't be back until the kids are out of school, which means, "Sorry kid, I just can't."

"Mom, is this about the last time we went rollerblading? I promise not to make fun of your wobbly giraffey legs. I swear!"

Score one for the little turd.

Beauty Is Only Skin Deep
Unless you look like the after photo. Lane 2 caught me in a hurry this morning. I was "trying" to get ready fast and thought, "What the hell, I'll throw on a ball-cap, (more on the phrase ball-cap another day) some sweats, a t-shirt and my coat. As I opened the front door, knowing I looked like crap, but not really caring, I saw the sun. For the first time in weeks it shone brightly, blinding-bright. I found my shades in my purse, put them on. Lane 2 said in the sweetest little voice, "Mommy, you look like Britney Spears."

Folks, I don't have blonde hair, wasn't wearing makeup or a belly shirt and flares, so my guess is that she meant I look like the trashy new Britney. The after photo, if you will. Great!

Score one for the little witch.

He Is The Cat's Ass
Besides the squeaky farts, Guido The Killer Cat From Hell makes with his furry butt trumpet, he is also able to entertain my children with his steal Mom's chair thing he does so well. It doesn't matter if I am sitting in the kitchen, living room or on the toilet, this cat wants to sit wherever my warm ass has been. The kids think this is hysterical because it's a game both of them used to play with me when they were smaller. Sometimes Guido sits on my lap, other times, he just waits for me to get up and then claims whatever throne. I have my favorite places to sit in my house, I think everyone does. Maybe this is Guido's way of trying to let me know who is in charge. Whatever the case, he is in my very favorite chair that I wish I were in right now.

Score one for Old Farty Cat.

Searching For Skullet
For the person who keeps Googling "what is a skullet" and keeps finding this blog, take the time to read the dagnam post, sheesh! Check in the italicized print at the bottom of the post, it's there, you have to READ.

For the rest of you, what is the oddest or dirtiest thing someone has searched for and "found" your blog? If you like reading about items searched and found on blogs, see Buster's blog, he posts about this every Tuesday. And let me tell ya, he gets some major freaks!

Share And Share Alike
I told you all about my day. Now it's your turn. Leave me a nice long comment or send me an e-mail and tell me about your day. I know Blogger comments has been fighting with some people lately. E-mail your comments if you have trouble and I'll post them later. I'm starting to think Haloscan may be the way to go. If your day sucked, sorry. Just think, the weekend is almost here!

I am going back to my parent's house tomorrow morning and will be there until Monday evening. I don't imagine I'll be posting until I get back or maybe on Tuesday. While I am away, see Hissyfit, my buddy Veronica needs good vibes, please send her some love and while you are there, checkout her amazing artwork. Stop by Broken Roads to read Becka's silliness. She was the Odd Todd Blogger Of The Week. Also, see Bloomin' Onionhead because he finished his seven-part Build-A-Bear story and it is incredibly funny. Don't forget to leave comments for these two funny bloggers. Speaking of funny, did you all watch the latest segment of the Fruitcake Lady? Very funny stuff. Please continue sending in your thoughts about lifelong relationships and marriage. Thanks to those of you who have already sent them via e-mail to Have a great weekend!