I Hope Your Merries are Happy and Your Happies are Merry!

Oh my gosh! I have neglected you again! I am so sorry. Time seems so little to be had. The kids are out of school. The weather is crap. I do not feel the spirit of Christmas, whatsoever. I feel more like the reindeer shit left out in the cold. But, like everything sucky, this too shall pass.

I have been trying to keep up with my blog on Funny or Die, my family blog and my stalking. Yeah, I'm at it again. I have to get a great writing job. Otherwise, I may go batshit crazy, and I doubt that will look cute on me.

When I write stuff for my Funny or Die site, I am trying to get the joke out first, and 10 out of 10 times I beat all late night comics to the punchline. And I'd go even further to say my punchline kicks their punchline's ass a lot of the times.

I wanted to take a moment to give three cheers to Joe Ducey of ABC Phoenix. However, I beat him to the newz by four years. Better late than never, Joe! I just saw a report he wrote online about the dangers of plastic packaging.

You long-time readers will note, I saved many a needy bitch, specifically Barbie, from the clutches of her packaging, which nearly resulted in my own death. (Slight exaggeration may have occurred.)

You can read or reread my version of that same story here.

But kudos to Joe and the ABC news team for getting that important safety information out there, without all that colorful language.

There are no promises for early June with the Spike Feresten show so I've got to keep plugging along and try every option I can find. Since the face of late night is changing so much right now, I'm trying to make contact with everyone. I've also decided to try harder with traditional methods toward success. I really don't want a manager or an agent because that means I'd have to share my earnings. But, since I am not making any earnings this way, I guess it is reasonable to try every avenue. The goal is to have something solid for 2009. Did I just make a New Year's Resolution? Crap!

Christmas is going to be in Missouri again. I was hoping to stay home and get the kids rooms finished as part of their Christmas present, but my old man had an old fashioned shit ball. So I'm going to put all my big girl words away and be on my best behavior.

I hope each one of you has a wonderful Christmas!